the notes the notes where are the notes !

Previously on Temporal Pests our characters were imperilled and someone not me lost the notes on what happened next so you'll just have to endure a flashback to an older episode again ...


Let There be Ba#$s!

Reposted in honor of the imminent return of a certain fuzzy elf

"So why do we need the boys to build a transtellar transport device that generates wormholes," asked JonaHexed, who hadn't been allowed to read the list yet?

"Something happens to Reg's Taxi but that's not for another hour," answered Sassy.

"But we have Lady Zen Shipper?" stated Jonahexed.

"Apparently building the gate allows a lost and forgotten character to return."

"So who's next," asked Fluvia, leaning closer to read down the list which Goldie was holding up in her mouth for Sassy to read," THEM? the little blue pests!"

No Dear Readers not the ones starting with S.

Meanwhile a memorial statue of a fuzzy elfish being in San Francisco was  surrounded by a horde or swarm of small blue beings all wailing,

"They killed Daddy B@#f! They killed Papa B@#f!"

"And Hewlett finally caught the last of us and banned us from the school grounds!" bewailed another holding an empty whiskey bottle.

Lady Zen Shipper appeared next to the normally invisible yet oddly never a hazard to aircraft or avians giant comatose alien.

"Look!" squealed one of the smarter Bamfs who instead of crying had been panhandling from tourists, "it's the Dragon Queen and the Time Queen and the Teckel Princess!"

The Ba#$ stopped crying and swarmed over to the Girls.

"Hello boys!" barked Sassy, "wanna a job!"

To be continued in the usual erratic manner.

Look I told you this was about a temporal crisis ... must be causing timeloops ?

Two Englishmen

Two Englishmen

... mmm ... well one's sorta Anglo-Irish but ...


In a place that is between worlds even when worlds converge there is a wood full of ponds that are portals in one section but there is also beyond a small pond and river a village and in that village a house on a hill with a large tree in the garden framing a view of a distant mountain. In that house two English men were having afternoon tea. There was ham and cheese and sandwiches and scones and berries and cream and a pot of tea which was always the right temperature and coffee that was never bitter and other delights. One of them had a pipe full of tobacco which never made you sick and really did have a fragant aroma and was blowing smoke rings. The other was looking out the window.Their wives who were out in the garden tending herbs waved up at him.

"Jack the mail is about to arrive!"

A moment later a very large pigeon wearing a WWII pilots cap came through the window and perched on the tea tables edge patiently waiting for an reward of hot buttered scone as the man called jack untied the message scroll from the bird.

"Ron duty calls!"

The two men got up from the teatable donned sensible woollen jackets with really useful deep pockets and picked up walking sticks made of a wood from a tree of the sort spirits dwell in and stranger creatures.

A small unicorn tossed its mane at them in greeting as they crossed into the forest and approached a pond from  which steam was rising. It showed a mass of swirling red and black clouds and a planetoid surrounded by a force field appraoching Earths sun with ramscoops extended to collect plasma to restart fusion reactors and odder devices .

"Mmm Teckelstein's powering up for something."

Next powering up ...