Earth 2 point something.
someone is smugly contemplating the damage his arrival has caused when a shrill greeting disrupts his revery.
"Hey stoneface howsait going!?"
Some one shudders.
Several hours later
" ... and blah blah blah "
Stoneface hisses cos final letter of the greek abc doesnt work on Goullawks
" just eff off will you!"
"Oh I won the bet I made him swear ! "
Stoneface sobs
There are things even neogodlings dread and an afternoon spent with a Goullawk is one of them.
Saturday, 6 December 2014
Thursday, 13 November 2014
Hints for Grant Ward
Apparently next week if you're a US viewer lucky people sob
#GrantWard of #AgentsofShield will be having some very special family fun time with his brother Satan er Xtian er well he's an evil Republican senator so here are some suggestions for things they can do together.
1)Throw Xtian into the boot of your car along with a phone set on speaker and as you drive sing into your phone to the tune of 10 Green bottles on a wall
10 MORE MILES TO THE WELL
2) He's a Republican Senator
tie him up and make him watch his own mid term advertising several hundred times
3) He's a Republican Senator
You tube clips of Obama talking and smiling and being happy !
4) Tell him you're going to visit the last of your SHIELD and HYDRA emergency caches and donate to whoever his Democrat opponent is
5) He's a Republican Senator.
Give him some drug that temporarily blocks him from speaking dress him as a homeless person or remove all his ID and then leave him at a public hospital emergency room with a note taped to his clothing.
"I voted against Affordable Healthcare and extra funding for homeless vets!"
I do wonder what the script writers will come up with?
#GrantWard of #AgentsofShield will be having some very special family fun time with his brother Satan er Xtian er well he's an evil Republican senator so here are some suggestions for things they can do together.
1)Throw Xtian into the boot of your car along with a phone set on speaker and as you drive sing into your phone to the tune of 10 Green bottles on a wall
10 MORE MILES TO THE WELL
2) He's a Republican Senator
tie him up and make him watch his own mid term advertising several hundred times
3) He's a Republican Senator
You tube clips of Obama talking and smiling and being happy !
4) Tell him you're going to visit the last of your SHIELD and HYDRA emergency caches and donate to whoever his Democrat opponent is
5) He's a Republican Senator.
Give him some drug that temporarily blocks him from speaking dress him as a homeless person or remove all his ID and then leave him at a public hospital emergency room with a note taped to his clothing.
"I voted against Affordable Healthcare and extra funding for homeless vets!"
I do wonder what the script writers will come up with?
Saturday, 1 November 2014
Ward Wolf
#fanfic
I just got a delivery of some memos from someone's desk.
Director C&*#$% to All Staff
The Smoked Salmon is missing again!
I refuse to believe it was stolen by a talking dachshund.
There is NO such thing as a dimensional hopping sentient dachshund!
The pawprints leading to Vault D were NOT Funny.
When I'm on the subject of Vault D there is no truth to the claim Agent Skype walks "the monster from the vault" on a leash when there's a full moon.
I also want to speak to the person who smuggled a chocolate labrador Retriever onto the base. It is currently in my office trying to be friendly and wears a tag with the name "Buddy". Not funny!
Director C@#$%^# to all agents.
There is now a shoot on sight authorization for anyone entering food storage without written authorization. My clearance level has its privileges. Smoked salmon is one of them.
While I was off consulting with that Doctor from UNIT someone graffitied these words on my office wall ...It's KREE! No spray paint is to be removed from the machine shop without authorization. Also why is there a copy of something called the Guide to the Marvel on my desk? We all know there are NO mutants or hidden cities in the Himalayas! Really People!
Director C#$%&*@ to All Staff
Wardwolf has escaped.
More importantly my smoked salmon is still going missing!
And that chocolate labrador is still on base!
It is drooling at my plate of cookies!
I want that dog off base and the salmon returned or a locker search will be made!
Have I mentioned Goullawks and Teckelsteiners love salmon?
I just got a delivery of some memos from someone's desk.
Director C&*#$% to All Staff
The Smoked Salmon is missing again!
I refuse to believe it was stolen by a talking dachshund.
There is NO such thing as a dimensional hopping sentient dachshund!
The pawprints leading to Vault D were NOT Funny.
When I'm on the subject of Vault D there is no truth to the claim Agent Skype walks "the monster from the vault" on a leash when there's a full moon.
I also want to speak to the person who smuggled a chocolate labrador Retriever onto the base. It is currently in my office trying to be friendly and wears a tag with the name "Buddy". Not funny!
Director C@#$%^# to all agents.
There is now a shoot on sight authorization for anyone entering food storage without written authorization. My clearance level has its privileges. Smoked salmon is one of them.
While I was off consulting with that Doctor from UNIT someone graffitied these words on my office wall ...It's KREE! No spray paint is to be removed from the machine shop without authorization. Also why is there a copy of something called the Guide to the Marvel on my desk? We all know there are NO mutants or hidden cities in the Himalayas! Really People!
Director C#$%&*@ to All Staff
Wardwolf has escaped.
More importantly my smoked salmon is still going missing!
And that chocolate labrador is still on base!
It is drooling at my plate of cookies!
I want that dog off base and the salmon returned or a locker search will be made!
Have I mentioned Goullawks and Teckelsteiners love salmon?
Thursday, 23 October 2014
Please Visit the Archives
I think the girls have been kidnapped by aliens or hydra or something.
Please visit the Archives and read older posts until they're released or escape.
Please visit the Archives and read older posts until they're released or escape.
Thursday, 16 October 2014
"DAD SKILLS"
Fans of a certain Cardiff produced TV program have noticed after a major tiff a certain English teacher changed her mind about a certain Traveller the next episode.
Someone apparently improved or had a refresher for their "dad skills" .
Others of you may remember a certain fan joke about Coulson referring to using the services of one of UNIT's consultants.
MMM
We now bring you yet another irresponsible piece of cross genre fanfic!
The office of a certain Director. All is quiet. The sound proofing is muffling the the howling from the basement. The damaged Brit is sharing the Xbox with a friend. The girls are practising on the target range. The Director is watching ballroom dancing videos on youtube.
Cloenig is on the phone with ... how many brothers does he have?
Suddenly a familiar noise fills the air and a large six sided object with doors on one side appears and a frantic figure leaps through the doors and bounds towards the Director's desk.
"You! You! You have to help me!" he screams in a mildly Glasgow Scots accent.
"How did you find this location!" snaps the Director.
"Oh I used to work for UNIT and my sort of maybe not yet dead wife goes shopping with a dragonoid and a dachshund who apparently know someone who "Ships" for some one ... was it Granite or Warden ... look I'll pay ... I'll give you my phone number!"
"Are you a certain xenobiology expert?" asks the Director.
"Yes! Yes thats me and I need a refresher in dad skills. My girl is being impossible! ... and I'll buy you a FULL tank of fuel for your AIRBUS!"
"DONE!"
Some time later his pupil having left the Director is sitting at his desk typing up class notes having had a bright idea for a best selling DIY book to raise funds!
DAD SKILLS
BOSS SKILLS
by Fil Martini
Lesson One Share and cook family meals!
Includes my recipe for kale and steak !
Is there any chance Whedon is reading this?
Come on humor include at least one reference to that British consultant!
Someone apparently improved or had a refresher for their "dad skills" .
Others of you may remember a certain fan joke about Coulson referring to using the services of one of UNIT's consultants.
MMM
We now bring you yet another irresponsible piece of cross genre fanfic!
The office of a certain Director. All is quiet. The sound proofing is muffling the the howling from the basement. The damaged Brit is sharing the Xbox with a friend. The girls are practising on the target range. The Director is watching ballroom dancing videos on youtube.
Cloenig is on the phone with ... how many brothers does he have?
Suddenly a familiar noise fills the air and a large six sided object with doors on one side appears and a frantic figure leaps through the doors and bounds towards the Director's desk.
"You! You! You have to help me!" he screams in a mildly Glasgow Scots accent.
"How did you find this location!" snaps the Director.
"Oh I used to work for UNIT and my sort of maybe not yet dead wife goes shopping with a dragonoid and a dachshund who apparently know someone who "Ships" for some one ... was it Granite or Warden ... look I'll pay ... I'll give you my phone number!"
"Are you a certain xenobiology expert?" asks the Director.
"Yes! Yes thats me and I need a refresher in dad skills. My girl is being impossible! ... and I'll buy you a FULL tank of fuel for your AIRBUS!"
"DONE!"
Some time later his pupil having left the Director is sitting at his desk typing up class notes having had a bright idea for a best selling DIY book to raise funds!
DAD SKILLS
BOSS SKILLS
by Fil Martini
Lesson One Share and cook family meals!
Includes my recipe for kale and steak !
Is there any chance Whedon is reading this?
Come on humor include at least one reference to that British consultant!
Sunday, 5 October 2014
Agents of Naughtiness!
Agents of Naughtiness
probably #fanfiction this couldnt have really happened anywhere in the multiverse? Could it?
What still no paypal tips ?
Okay you're just going to have to put up with another out of sequence of one of the girls' recent misadventures.
A secret facility somewhere ... apparently you can land and hide an HUGE airbus with driving distance of wher- ever a certain general lives with no one noticing?
What a marvellous universe!
Director Carving into Walls is my new hobby is staring out of the window and hasnt noticed the live feed from Vault 4 of just HOW Skype is interrogating Buddy's Best Friend who curiously is now wearing a WILFRED outfit with chocolate brown fur and is rolling on the floor either trying to look cute or convince Skype after that recent psychotic break he needs a REAL therapist!
Clonig or is he a droid is standing in front of the screen clearly praying Director Yoga is not my Hobby stays by the window.
Just then a statue materializes in the middle of the office.
Well it looks like a statue but a door opens in the plinth and a certain notorious twosome emerge.
Goldie cheerfully and loudly.
"Hellooo darlings I understand you're recruiting?"
Director Gosh was that Kree Blood whirls around and spills his coffee as his first reaction on seeing our beloved Goullawk and Dachshund characters is to draw a gun.
"You were banned from ALL SHIELD Faculties!"
"We're willing to apologize for putting a smiley face on your boss' eyepatches!"
meekly declaimed the canine member of this duo.
"So are you recruiting!? We do filing and martial arts soo!"
Director Connect the Kree equations is about to snarl at them when he notices whats going despite downstairs despite Clonig standing in front of the screens.
"We also do therapy!" states Goldie!
"Thats it! I give up! I'm going to the real Tahiti!"
Just then Fitz wanders in from the lab and unlike everyone else in the room is not being hysterical.
"Oh helloo girls!"
He walks towards the plinth of the statue.
"Just where do you think you're going?" asks Director forced to travel coach.
"The girls are taking me to visit a special Doctor!"
Cut to final scene Director Over stressed is quietly sobbing.
He wanted to go visit the man in the Blue Box too!
More silliness sooner or later!
Argh grr must get back to fixing chapter 3 of REAL serious novel!
probably #fanfiction this couldnt have really happened anywhere in the multiverse? Could it?
What still no paypal tips ?
Okay you're just going to have to put up with another out of sequence of one of the girls' recent misadventures.
A secret facility somewhere ... apparently you can land and hide an HUGE airbus with driving distance of wher- ever a certain general lives with no one noticing?
What a marvellous universe!
Director Carving into Walls is my new hobby is staring out of the window and hasnt noticed the live feed from Vault 4 of just HOW Skype is interrogating Buddy's Best Friend who curiously is now wearing a WILFRED outfit with chocolate brown fur and is rolling on the floor either trying to look cute or convince Skype after that recent psychotic break he needs a REAL therapist!
Clonig or is he a droid is standing in front of the screen clearly praying Director Yoga is not my Hobby stays by the window.
Just then a statue materializes in the middle of the office.
Well it looks like a statue but a door opens in the plinth and a certain notorious twosome emerge.
Goldie cheerfully and loudly.
"Hellooo darlings I understand you're recruiting?"
Director Gosh was that Kree Blood whirls around and spills his coffee as his first reaction on seeing our beloved Goullawk and Dachshund characters is to draw a gun.
"You were banned from ALL SHIELD Faculties!"
"We're willing to apologize for putting a smiley face on your boss' eyepatches!"
meekly declaimed the canine member of this duo.
"So are you recruiting!? We do filing and martial arts soo!"
Director Connect the Kree equations is about to snarl at them when he notices whats going despite downstairs despite Clonig standing in front of the screens.
"We also do therapy!" states Goldie!
"Thats it! I give up! I'm going to the real Tahiti!"
Just then Fitz wanders in from the lab and unlike everyone else in the room is not being hysterical.
"Oh helloo girls!"
He walks towards the plinth of the statue.
"Just where do you think you're going?" asks Director forced to travel coach.
"The girls are taking me to visit a special Doctor!"
Cut to final scene Director Over stressed is quietly sobbing.
He wanted to go visit the man in the Blue Box too!
More silliness sooner or later!
Argh grr must get back to fixing chapter 3 of REAL serious novel!
Wednesday, 24 September 2014
A Taste of Temporal Pests
A Taste of Temporal Pests.
Temporal Pests invites you to check out older posts while I am editing and finishing another project. !
Expect more bumping!
Temporal Pests invites you to check out older posts while I am editing and finishing another project. !
Expect more bumping!
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